Pants

I am having a conflict lately. All my jeans that I wear for work, are not suiting me lately. I tried out some pairs that I left on the floor over the winter a couple of times, and remembered why I left them on the floor. I don't know what it is, and I'm not insuating anything, but the zipper on a couple of the pairs of pants won't stay up. I need to just throw them out, its as annoying as can be when I have to spend half the day trying to zip them back up. I need to figure out a system to mark them. I put them in the wash and forgot which ones they were so now they are back in the rotation.

I also have several pairs that are worn down and are getting worse. I had a pair on today that I thought might get me through the end of the summer, but now the right leg has more breaks and holes in in than I can reasonably expect to tolerate. I have another pair that I ripped near the crotch that needs sewing or retiring also. I can get away with wearing a pair of running shorts under them, but that is really kind of a lame thing to do as a daily wear feature. Most of my pants

The issue is that I have other pairs of nice jeans, but I don't want to ruin them by wearing them on the farm. They may look good for a while, but eventually they will get run down and not usable as social wear jeans. This won't be to much of a problem, the last pair of good jeans I bought was from the goodwill store and didn't cost very much. So, I might not be losing out very much by wearing a pair of once expensive jeans, but feel bad about doing so.

I also have another new issue with my jeans. I apparently have lost some inches around my waist and can't or shoudn't go around without a belt. I spent most of the evening today pulling up my 'britches and wondering why I didn't put a belt on. I may have to buy a whole new set of pants again soon anyways. I do have two belts that are adjustable to a very small size, but one of them is a nicer belt that I wear out subbing, and the other pair I have had for almos nine years now.

I did do some yard work today and gave myself a blister. I had been lobbying to use the roto-tiller to till up my flower beds, but my grandpa didn't want to budge on my using a hoe that he bought last year. I worked my beds up pretty well, but got a pretty good blister in the process. I did manage to pop it later when I was shoveling later in the day, but I am apprehensive that it is going to be real sore.

times typed "oftern"-0

near graduation

Well tomorrow is the last day of my student teaching. The kids finished up thier research aspect today, and I convinced a couple of groups to do a short presentation. Tomorrow I am administering the post tests and will have those evaluated by monday. The student teaching part was probably the easiest part of the process so far, and I now have until the end of july to finish my thesis and such. I already have much of that put together. so if all goes well I might finish early and by early I mean before four years pass, which is longer than it should take to get a degree. Especially since I am not goign to be a doctor.

I also get to go to UC's graduation sunday. Dr. Weber is graduating and asked if me and the lady would like to come so I said sure. Being a yes man is fun sometimes. At first I wasn't sure if he had anyone coming because they would be driving from Akron, but he did say his dad and uncle would be down also. Hopefully The weather holds off and the day turns out well.

I am also really tempted to go out and buy super mario galaxy 2 this weekend. It comes out sunday sometime, but I don't really want to spend 50 bucks on a game when I should be doing school work and have other games to play. I think I will make myself play through super mario galaxy 1 as luigi first and get all 120 stars as him. I should also play that resident evil game that I haven't even played yet, and get some more practice time in with grand slam tennis. So it would seem I have plenty of video game ambitions to last me for a while.

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club meetings.

I was watching sherlock holmes the other day and was trying to decide what group might be the bad guys in the movie. There were a secretive society, and had some odd things that they had going on. I had guessed free masons, but that turned out to not be the case.

My dad has been part of the mason club or group for as long as I can tell. I never really got into all that business, it seems a bit outdated to me. For me, and I may be wrong here, clubs that hold meetings such as they do are outdated. Meeting monthly for no real purpose other than discussion seems pointless nowadays. Up until the age of internet and cell phones, clubs and meetings were the best way to socialize and get out of the house. Nowadays, finding out news and happenings takes hardly any effort. I can't see the point of rushing out and sitting with people that live in my address for an hour. Back when it was much harder to communicate, I could see that happening, but nowadays my entertainment is a phone call away.

I was also surprised to read something on the catholic answer forums regarding the free masons. Apparently the masons take their belief system farther than the catholic church would like. As such, I would have to decide between the two if I were to consider joining the masons. As such, I never have considered becoming a mason and much enjoy being catholic so its a moot point for me. I have attened masonic events and was beginning to think that they treated themselves as more than a club of sorts. I will still likely attend such events at my dads request, but am not going to search those events out.

I am in one club that I think is differentiated from my treatment of other clubs. I am in an azp alumni group which is a fraternity I was in in college. The goal of this club is to serve our active chapter, not meet weekly and become chatty kathys. While we are just starting out, we have only had two meetings so far and it looks like the rest of those will be quarterly. Hopefully this club is doing something worthwhile.

In other news, walter has been acting sick lately. He has made a mess in his cage the last two nights and has resumed making messes in the house. I haven't gave him anything since yesterday evening, and will see if his diet is part of the problem. I may have to take him to the vet if he keeps this up. I am going to keep him in the house as much as I can and not give him much food.

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getting close.

Well the weekend has been prettty nice. Friday I went to the reds game with the vet tech, saturday I helped around the greenhouse, then went to church and came home. Today I went to my grandma's place and got to help with the yardwork as it is a bit of a family tradition to help grandma get some of her yardwork done this so she doesn't do it all herself and bust up her shoulder again. I spent the majority of my time riding the mower around and pulling a lawn roller around in an effort to flattern out some of the hills and spots like that in her yard. After I got done we hung around for a while and then left to go see the new krogers out in mt. orab. I wasn't all that impressed with the new store, all that many groceries in one place seems a bit excessive to me. The lower prices don't really beat any convenience that I get from the grocery store that is much closer to my house. My local grocery offers enough to satisfy me.

I did get to put a check in the bank that put me near to a goal I have. With my next subbing pay check, I should get over that and then have to decide if I want to spend it or keep saving. If I do spend some of that money from my savings, I am going to keep at least enough to pay for my mortgage for a year. I don't want to make a mistake and not be able to pay that.

I also have some prospects for jobs. I started my grad project last week and should finish by this friday. If I can get my paperwork done soon after, I can apply to some science based teachign jobs. One job came up nearby with a retirement, and I seen some decent sounding jobs on the ode web site also. I have always kind of thought that I wouldn't be a career teacher, but if I can bet a couple of years in a savings account, then I might be able to make a down payment on some land if some farmers decided they might be willing to sell. I don't know if its much of a career plan, but I really can't see myself working for a boss my entire life. Maybe it is the fact that us Hauke's all have been self employed, but I am not a big fan of working at other peoples discretion.

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back in the saddle again.

Well tomorrow I get to the chance to do what I consider some real teaching. I get to be in a class and direct my own lesson plans and grade on what think should be occurring. I finally got enough of my masters work together and am going into a classroom tomorrow morning. This also means I will get to do my teacher routine, and wake up at 5, shower and shave, goof off on the computer and fix lesson plans until I need to leave and leave. If I thought I could get in the building, I would be there at 6 in the morning, but as it is, I am going to have to wait until my usual show up time to get there.It's exciting to be able to go in there and be able to say and do and direct the kids how I want. As a sub, I don't want to over step a boundary and pretend that I know what the lesson the kids are doing is. I am worried about a student saying "well mr. hauke said we could do it this way" when the teacher has their own reasons for doing the lessons the way they do. If I am not lined up with the contracted teachers goals, I could be frowned upon and blacklisted. I know that won't happen though, because the only question I get asked is if I am available. I don't get asked if I like math or english or what I feel comfortable doing. I am working because I say yes when the call comes.

I am really lucky in some regards. The teacher I am cooperating with has agreed to let me in sight unseen and is willing to cover my classes I am subbing for the duration of the work. I don't think I will need the six days I asked for. I think the students will settle on a fix quickly and be done within four days. I am going to pay her for covering for me and also give her a gift card to the greenhouse.


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I pledge...

my head to clearer thinking,
my hands to greater service,
my health to better living,
and heart to... well i can't remember.

Well that is what I remember from the 4-H pledge. With all the propaganda there is about voting to support 4-H, I don't think it will continue.

I was big into 4-H, but a little bit less after I got started in FFA. I really kind of lost interest when the group decided they didn't want to vote me as president. I was good enough to be the FFA president, but the 4-H group wanted a girl who projects were photography or some lamer project.

One of the reasons I am not in support of the vote is the youth involvment. Not many kids are taking the core projects such as livestock and crops. Sure, many young people enjoy taking projects, but for the most part the fair is a big expense that doesn't apply anymore. Schools have to let kids out a week, parents have to give out all kinds of money, and neither of those support agriculture, the basis for a county fair.

The county fair is to commercial. The basis for such an event should be agriculture, and not enough kids are involved in agriculture nowadays. I don't think our tax dollars are worth pumping money into that fund. Use them for something else. The kids that do live on farms and have an interest in livestock will just have to go on some independent program until they get to high school and join FFA. That is if FFA is even around and not cut from high schools by that time.

I don't think enough kids live on farms to justify having a solid 4-H program. I can only think of three I graduated with that did real farming that would have projects to show off their work. I don't know what those numbers are for the rest of the area, but it can't be all that high. Why should tax dollars be forced into that program when the youth around will not get that benefit?

Another reason is who is going to administer the 4-h program? Money keeps getting cut for the ag departments county wide. The person who was in charge when I was around is now doing two counties and the job likely won't be replaced when she retires.

Most of the projects now a days at the county fairs are small household animals and photography. Gun projects and 4-wheeler safety also seem to dominate. Sure the kids are interested, but I don't think making a fuss for those is worth the effort. Youth today are going to park themselves in front of computers and TV's, and saying or acting like 4-h is going to help will not help.

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Diet regime change

One of the websites I can get on while subbing and bored during some classes is runners world website. I like to read the training tips and see what shoes are out that other runners recommend. I'll read the 50/50 authors blog on that site and some other blogs also. The training tips are good, and I find the articles about motivating myself to run good also.


The other day I was reading the diet section and decided that I really needed to change my diet if I want any type of physique. I have seen the future and I don't like it. My dad recently started wearing suspenders and a belt. His "we get all the exercise we need from working hard on the farm" belief is not doing him favors. The thing is, when he was in his late 20's like me, he was skinnier than I am now. I am ahead of schedule to look like him and be overweight if not obese.

So, the point is I read an article on runners world about dieting as a runner. The site put up a list of things a runner should eat, so I wrote them down and am going to take it to the grocery store So far, the things I have tried aren't bad at all. Almonds are good, whole grain bread isn't as bad as I thought it was. I just had a thing of yogurt and it was okay also. Eating good while I am at my house isn't going to be much of a problem. The issue is going to be moderation at my parents and grandparents house. I eat so much when I am there, its not funny. I play and do so much cleanup. I am going to have to force myself to eat just one plate of food and cut back that way. I am going to get some questions, but I don't think I should be carrying around as much weight as I am.

The good news is that milk and eggs are in for such a diet. One egg is about 10% of what I would need in a day, so that is good news for me. Milk might be the thing I drink the most of, followed closely by water. I would really like to put a water fountain in my house like they have at schools. When I was in the dorms, my room was right next to a water fountain and I drank water all the time. When I was teaching at EB, my room was next to the water fountain also and I drank water all the time. That really is what helped me take off some of the weight I had put on from the previous year. I was down to the two-teens by christmas break.

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Self Doubt

Tonight I watched a movie called special where the main character takes medication that removes his self doubt. In this movie, he ends up thinking he has super powers until he pissed the wrong people off and gets a beat down by people he can't see. He then locks himself in a convenience store bathroom, goes through with-drawl and grunts a bunch. Even after the with-drawl, he still walks around saying that people can't tell him to stop. Wasn't a real exciting movie, but I did like it.

This caused me to think about what I would do if I could do anything. If my self doubt was erased what would I do? Would I work more? I already feel pretty confident about the amount of income I have. I don't think I would even want a better job or more work if I didn't have any self doubt. Not many people get the oppurtunity to work this close to their family as I do. Sure they make me angry sometimes, but people I am not related to can just as easily aggravate me. I think I would try to find more land to farm around here, but that will come eventually. I am still young, and all the older farmers around aren't going to want to farm forever. I have found a girl that likes me, so as long as I can maintain that, self doubt isn't really an issue. Once a person has managed to find work and people they enjoy, what more is there to look forward to in life? Maybe one day I will have a family of my own to not have doubts with, but as of now, I feel pretty good about myself. So in effect, self doubt would be good to get rid off, but without self doubt, I don't think I would be doing much different. My life is pretty good when I think over things and I can't think of any situation I would prefer to be in.

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